Thread: which one do you like better?

For english natives:

Which one sounds more natural/appropiate/correct for poetry?

1. "Walker, there is no road, you make your road out of walking"
2. “Path walker there is no path, path is created by one´s walk”

For those who are wondering where this phrase is from, I'll tell you. It's from Antonio Machado, a early twentieth century spanish poet very popular in hispanic literature. The original version is as follows:

"Caminante no hay camino, se hace camino al andar"

1. "Walker, there is no road, you make your road out of walking"
2. “Path walker there is no path, path is created by one´s walk”

Hi jchavez,
out of these two I like number one, but it might sound better to say something like, "walker/traveller, there is no road, you make your own road walking/traveling."

Walker, there is no road. You make your own road by walking.

Originally Posted by elmeromero

Walker, there is no road. You make your own road by walking.

de acuerdo...this sounds the most fluid.

Originally Posted by jchavez

For english natives:

Which one sounds more natural/appropiate/correct for poetry?

1. "Walker, there is no road, you make your road out of walking"
2. “Path walker there is no path, path is created by one´s walk”

For those who are wondering where this phrase is from, I'll tell you. It's from Antonio Machado, a early twentieth century spanish poet very popular in hispanic literature. The original version is as follows:

"Caminante no hay camino, se hace camino al andar"

Hola!

No tengo ninguna experiencia traduciendo poemas, pero me he atrevido a traducir este. Creo que la palabra "caminante" se traduce mejor en este contexto como "sojourner" en vez de "walker". He puesto el poema en castellano primero para dar una idea al foro del contexto completo del poema. Este poema lo escuche como cancion hace cerca de 40 ahnos, cuando vivia en USA, lo escuche en la universidad de George Washington, en D.C. Es muy hermoso, la connotacion es diferente en ingles pienso yo - como todo poema, es muy dificil de traducir, ojala no lo haya malogrado.

Caminante, son tus pasos
el camino y nada mas
Caminante, no hay camino,
se hace camino al andar.
Al andar se hace camino,
y al volver la vista atras
se ve la senda que nunca
se ha de volver a pasar.
Caminante, no hay camino
sino estelas en la mar.

Yo lo he traducido asi (con mil disculpas a los traductores/poetas):

Sojourner,
A road is nothing else but your footprints
Sojourner, there is no road
We create our own road as we walk along
As we walk along, we create our own path
And when we turn around
We see the road that we will never travel again
Sojourner, there is no road
There are only trails on the surface of the sea.


De nuevo, mil disculpas a los traductores/poetas, "I just had to give it a try!"

El segundo verso es hermoso, algo como

Murio el poeta lejos de su hogar
Lo cubre el polvo de un pais vacio
...

He escuchado la cancion tambien, la canta Serrat.

Saludos

Isabel

Walker, there´s no walk...

There is one popular translation that says "Wanderer, there is no way,
you make the way as you go."

I like the last part but I don't like the word "wanderer" here, I think wanderer is someone who walks without focus, who just goes anywhere.
Caminante gives me the idea of a person who is going somewhere.

What do you think?

I agree with Vero!

How about a mix of the two?
Walker, there is no path, you make your own by walking!
I also like Nira's use of the word "sojourner" better than "walker".